ota

i had some hope but now it is all gone. its a cycle, i feel suicidal, i get hospitalized, i discharge, and it repeats. this will never end unless i end it myself

5 months ago

 4

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ota

after being in the hospital my view on people has changed, in a good way i hope

8 months ago

 3

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ota

sad

9 months ago

 1

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ota

im scared, my mom keeps threatening to send me to a hospital,.. she speaks to me in such a harsh tone its hard to believe she really cares, she says that no one can help me because i shut them off but ive told her so much recently and she still says that, i hate her and she tells my dad the things that i tell her when i dont want her to but why would she care about what i want? to her im just some mentally ill weirdo, a burden, and it would be better if im gone

9 months ago

 4

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ota

my mind twists things until they seem horrible and the worst they can be even if its just something small idk how to stop doing that its not like i do it on purpose but everything seems terrible because of it

9 months ago

 2

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ota

is it ok to stop talking to someone when they make you feel bad? idk what else to do but i always try to talk again later so its ok right? this is scary and i hate this

9 months ago

 3

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ota

just when i think im maybe making friends, of course thats not true why would anyone want that

9 months ago

 0

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ota

the only thing i have to look forward to is watching the stars while listening to music, its so peaceful, i want to show someone the stars too but i have no one

9 months ago

 2

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ota

i am only a person that people sometimes talk to, no one will really care when im gone

9 months ago

 3

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ota

there are a few people i talk to, but when are people considered friends? what if i really do have friends but i just cant realize it or know it, i think no one is my friend but what if that isnt true, the thought scares me

9 months ago

 4

 1

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